[FWDLK] "FOR SALE" Terminology

["Here,There or Somewhere" <creedy@xxxxxxxxxx>]

"For Sale" terminology aids

If the ad claims?                  it really means?

Rough condition?                too bad to lie about?
Parts car?                            beyond repair?
Immaculate?                       recently washed?
Concours?                         recently waxed?
Engine quiet?                    uses 90-weight oil..
Needs minor overhaul?     needs engine?
Needs major overhaul?     Phone the junkyard?
Burns no oil?                     (it all leaks out)
Rebuilt engine?                  Cleaned the spark plugs?
Drive it away?                    I live on a hill?
Drive it anywhere?             (within 10 miles)
Desirable classic?              No one wants it?
Rare classic..                        No one wanted it ,
                                             even when it was new?
Stored 20 years?                (in a farmers field)
Ran when stored?              Won't start?
Never apart?                      Bolts too rounded to loosen..
Solid as a rock?                 Rusted solid..
Restored with 0 miles?     Won't start..
Restored with 2 miles?     Won't stay running..
Older restoration?             First owner washed it?
Good investment?             Can't be worth much less?
No time to restore it?        Can't obtain parts?
95% complete?                 Other 5% doesn't exist?
Other interests conflict?    Spouse's ultimatum:  "Either that
                                             #!!@&##*!!! Thing goes or I
go!"

Mark & Don
     53,55,55,55